Unkindness is rife in our society. Extreme unkindness is, in simplistic terms, called abuse. To heal from abuse, we need an abundance of kindness. But our survival-based back brain preferentially focuses on unkindness, on danger and threat. In this podcast Carolyn talks about how to retrain our front brains to focus on and notice the many kindnesses that are in fact all around us.
Recovery from trauma is a journey, an orientation, a direction, not a specific location. Just head north – where you’re at is less important than which direction you’re headed in. In this podcast, Carolyn discusses why we can feel that recovery is impossible, how recovery perhaps doesn’t look as we imagine it to, and how society needs to help with ‘public transport’ to help us on our way.
When we’ve suffered abuse in childhood, we often experienced pain. And that pain was reflected back in the eyes of our abusers as pleasure. We then take that template and expectation into our adult relationships, expecting only to be able to get close to people or be approved of by them if we’re in pain. This is the topic of Carolyn’s blog post in which she draws on her own experiences in one particular therapy session.
Recovering from trauma takes time. In this podcast, Carolyn looks at how we often missed out on developmental stages during childhood, and how we have to learn what we were not in a position to learn as children – not least our ability to regulate our emotions, which isn’t a sign of character deficiency, but simply the loss of opportunity.
For a number of years, Carolyn was a foster carer, looking after many traumatised and abused children whose trauma, although unremembered and unspoken, was plain to see. In this post she describes the impact on her of hearing the cry of one particular baby, and how this acts as a metaphor for our own inner child.
When we have suffered trauma and pain, our brains find it hard to experience joy. But we need to put ourselves in the right place to find joy, and we need to cultivate it. In this podcast Carolyn talks about a life-transforming trip from 2012 and how the big breakthroughs are built on the backs of daily small breakthroughs.
Reindeer and suncream?! Life doesn’t always appear as we expect it to. In this podcast, Carolyn Spring talks about how trauma anticipates danger and badness, and how to develop the imagination for life to be different
Trauma focuses our brain on danger based on the ‘there-and-then’, and one of the hardest, but most helpful, things to do is to be able to just notice and be curious about our present experience in the ‘here-and-now’. In this blog post Carolyn talks about her experience of learning to do this.
In this podcast, Carolyn talks about the crippling isolation of shame, and how to move beyond it.
Is recovery from trauma and abuse – resulting in dissociation and even a dissociative disorder – possible? That’s the subject of this podcast where Carolyn Spring talks about the vulnerability of hoping for good things, the difference between correlation and causation, and the difference between hoping for and planning for.